The strength in leaning on support…

How do you feel when it comes to receiving support? From meeting many of you, I might hazard a guess to say that you probably often feel hyper independent, pride yourself on having your own shit together, and struggle to lean on support even when it's offered because as we know, you're a strong, independent woman. Am I right? 

I had the opportunity to found out how I feel about leaning hard on others this month, but it wasn't by choice…

I had the privilege of working overseas on an amazing women's paddle boarding tour for another company. It was a great opportunity, and everything went so well. The 9 female guests were so appreciative of me and I felt really helpful and valuable to the company while having a great time! THEN, after farewelling the guests at the airport… the sickness hit. 

I won’t trauma-dump the details on you, but I’ll just let you know that I managed to get get amoebic disentery, which isn’t nice (neither was the hospital! Gosh we have it good in Australia! Toilet paper, soap, gloved-up nurses and all). While I managed to get home only a day later than planned, I was a shell of a human. My body was very depleted, and I had 2 rest days before the first Kindred hike. I couldn’t see how this hike was gpoing to be able to go ahead without leaning hard on support, so lean hard I did!

My partner whipped into action, running the errands on our shared note that ticked-off everything from buying the gluten free and vegetarian trail snacks for our clients, printing manifests and route cards, and picking up the hired backpacks. My assistant Cloë, who was scheduled to back me up on the hike already, accepted the request to walk solo, knowing that she could reach us via satellite messaging and we would stay on-site for the day if she needed help. It was all systems go as I finalised a detailed itinerary for Cloë and updated the risk assessment and SOP from bed.

On the day, my partner Michael drove us both down to Waitpinga. He set up the gazebo, table and tubs of equipment and snacks, then made himself scarce as I met Cloë, met Taylah Lochert from Tanda (who had arrived to share her Welcome to Country with the guests), and greeted the clients. After mustering the energy for introductions and delivering a quick hike-packing “ABC” lesson, I surrendered and handed over to Cloë, kitting her up with the work phone, PLB and first aid kit, while the guests distributed the food water, group shelter, ground sheet and emergency warm gear between their packs.

I don’t have children yet, but seeing the group hike away gave me a microdose of how I imagine it must feel the first time you hand over your child to a babysitter, or drop them off on their first day of school! There was a slight anxiety, mixed with immense gratitude, and a bit of pride. I rested in the van and awaited the group’s messages and return, with Michael at the ready should they need support in the case of injury.

Of course it all went smoothly, and the guests had a great time and learnt so much from each other, from the trail, and from Cloë. The relief I felt after that was so loaded. Not only had the first Kindred hike been a success and done exactly what it said on the tin (gave women connection, craft and confidence through hiking), but I had also had my first successful experience of entrusting another leader to guide my clients. What an exercise in surrender and letting go! I have no doubt that this process helped to speed up my recovery.

For many women, accepting support can feel surprisingly uncomfortable. We don't want to inconvenience others. We don't want to appear incapable. We pride ourselves on being independent (thanks patriarchy). BUT this experience reminded me that independence and interdependence aren't opposites. The strongest communities are built on people supporting one another when it matters most.

This experience also made me reflect on the support I've received throughout my own hiking journey. I didn't learn everything I know alone. I've leaned on coaches, mentors, lecturers, colleagues and friends, and perhaps that's why I'm so passionate about helping other women shorten the learning curve. Becoming self-led outdoors doesn't mean doing it all by yourself.

SO…I'm currently developing "Hike Ready"; a 6-week online pathway taking women from curious to capable on multi-day hikes. If you've ever dreamed of planning and completing a multi-day hike but weren't sure where to start, I'd love to hear from you. If you’re ready to lean on the support of others to get yourself hiking and to feel self-led outdoors, I'm looking for 8 women to help shape the founding cohort. Simply click here to send an email with the subject “Hike Ready” and we can chat more about how I can support you, because I want you to feel the magic of surrendering to support to reach your goals too.